So it’s day 7 of the Covid-19 lockdown. Our medical community is braced for an influx of virus sufferers and I’m ensconced in the safety of my home. What could possibly go wrong?
Quite a bit it seems.
It only took 7 days but I’ve done it – produced a sequel to the “nail through the foot” incident of last year. All it took was a blown lightbulb and a step ladder – well a kitchen step ladder to be honest.
Yes, another foot injury. This time it’s torn ligaments along the side of my left foot, swelling, pain and embarrassment – in equal measures.
I fell from the bottom step of the ladder and managed to sprain my foot to such an extent the doctor was impressed. “The bottom step? Really? The bottom step, are you sure?”, were his words while examining my swollen and rapidly blackening foot.
One x-ray later and I’m in a moon-boot with enough pain killers and steroids to treat a horse. Easy.
I’ll be spending the next week with my foot elevated, garnering as much sympathy and as many cups of tea as I can.
Top Tip: If you do something silly like this, now is an oddly good time to do it. When Jean called my doctor as I lay groaning on the ground she advised me to visit the after hours clinic (in Newtown for me) as they are “very quiet”. Apparently all the usual maladies that fill the clinic’s waiting room have mysteriously been cured. At 1pm I was the only person in the waiting room and when I had my x-ray I was the radiographers second customer – that day.
I am impressed! Bottom rung of the ladder you say. I am intending to paint my two story house with a very long ladder. Commercial painters not interested. Only other option is a 15 foot paintbrush but that did not work so well last time. Given your extensive experience any tips?
Rossco H trainee painter!
Hey Ross, good to hear from you. Hope everyone in your bubble is fit and healthy. My only ladder tip is avoid the bottom step – that’s the dangerous one. Mind you my step ladder only had two steps – and I still managed to fall off it.
Graeme, there was no need to try and outshine my 2019 “tripping from the 2nd step and shattering my left leg and ankle” performance.
You were always going to fall short ;)
You’re right, I did my best to out do you – but it was a sad and pathetic effort really. Hail to to the champion.
Ouch you poor thing. You’re right though now is a good time to have sit around and do nothing for several weeks.
And I’m really good at doing nothing so I’m in my element here.